Sunday, May 23, 2010

A season of change

Well, here we are at 34 weeks! The sun is shinning and school is out for the summer. Many changes have happened already and many more to come. You may remember that I posted how I excited and thankful I was to have a part-time teaching job for next year. Well, as the excitement wore off and the more I thought about me trying to be a part-time teacher- part-time special education teacher- a thought came to my mind- "Who am I kidding?" I don't know what it means to do anything part-time and I seriously gave it some thought and decided that I needed to resign from teaching. Honestly, I've been frustrated with teaching for about two years now- feeling like I should be doing more and reflecting on the fact that I'm not the teacher I use to be. All these thoughts confirmed my decision to resign. So, as I closed out the last week of school, it was bitter sweet to completely clear out my room. Bitter in the fact that I have built positive relationships with students and I won't be there to see them continue and sweet in the fact that I decided to follow my heart and not let others talk me into doing something that is not what is best for me. I still have a few things to finish up on Monday, but then I was will officially be done. As far as work next year- I think I'm going to wait until baby arrives, see how much life is really going to change- and then in the fall if I'm really itching to go back to work- we'll see what's available. It's a bit scary to live this way without a definite plan, but Leif supports me 100% and that's all that really matters.

Some other changes this past two weeks ~ I learned my doctor I've been seeing in Cordova for prenatal care- resigned. I'm thankful for the care he provided
and that I only have one appointment left until I head to Anchorage. I can't imagine being back at 25 weeks and having to switch doctors. Another change- well, not so much change, but anticipation- I'm scheduled to have another ultra-sound on June 10th. I forgot at the 21 week ultra-sound the doctor saw two cysts on the baby's head and they wanted me to follow up to make sure the cysts had healed. I forgot about it because my doctor in Anchorage kept telling me how common it is. So, I'm excited to sneak a peak at the baby again before he/she will be born. However, will I be strong enough to not find out the sex of the baby?

Finally, throughout this busy two weeks, my car radio decided to turn on whenever it wanted to. Whether the car had keys in it or not, the radio would turn on. I left work one afternoon to hear my car radio on in my car. Thankfully, Leif was still at school for he had to jump my car because the battery was dead. It was just a short in the fuse, but still a little bizarre to come out to car with the radio on when the keys are in your hands.

Let the summer begin and the season of changes continue~ "Little Peanut" will be here before we know it!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day!!
Even though I'm not officially a mother yet, I appreciate more and more the love and things my mother did/does for me. I wish I could be home to take my mom to lunch and personally tell her how much I love her.

Throughout this pregnancy, I'm learning more and more about a mother's love for her child. I already love this little one and yet I haven't even seen him/her. Sure I may be annoyed with increased heartburn, unable to get comfortable at night, muscle pains from stretching ligaments, baby finding my ribs and kicking away, but these things are just annoyances. As I am sure as the years go by the annoyances will turn from baby telling me "No" all the time to a young child not wanting to do his/her homework, to a teenager who thinks he/she is all grown up and ready to face the world without momma and poppa's guidance... I will be annoyed but nothing will change the love I have for this child. It's hard to believe in just a few short weeks, I will be able to see and hold this child that I already love so much.